Making use of the Holiday

 ........

ksjdfsmxmskndsx

Some of the food I ate during my mid semester break in Kuala Lumpur. Did not waste any time in stuffing myself with all sorts of food that Kelantan don't have ( too lazy to search around ) . Subway, Sushi King, Zanmai, Kenny's Nando's, Domino's etc. Yup . I was able to fit all those in to my belly in just a mere 8-9 days.

Super grateful that I decided to go on a budget for 3 weeks before the holiday. Ended up buying lots of stuff. Enjoying each and every moment of the year end sale and what the stores had to offer. The best part is a majority of my spendings was with the money I had saved up. My parents did give me some cash but I mostly spend it on food.

Speaking of sales/stores/clothes etc. Finally I went to H&M. I know I know, before I had pledge to never visit the store but since it was located behind the hotel I was staying at what the heck ? Seeing for myself what it was all about. My reaction was a "Meh..ok" . I was not that amazed at what the stores have. I mean yeah, the clothes there are trendy and the price their are better than TopShop, Forever 21, Pull& Bear .... but none of the clothes attracted my attention at all. I tried on around 3 to 5 outfits from the store...Did not buy any of them. I don't know why. Is it because EVERYONE's (metaphor) wearing them? or whether because I'm accustomed to the brands/stores that I shop regularly ?

A few of my friends were confident to see me going all crazy on prints and such but to be honest, most of my spendings were on plain old basics. Basic polos, sweater, lounge wear....and one black and white print shirt. Aztecs/Prints are just everywhere nowadays I cannot stand them. Most of mine are now turned into sleep wear. Part of growing up I guess. Turning 20 next year *gasp*. Thank goodness for the year end sales, most of the stuff I bought was discounted up to 70% ..... the most expensive item I bought during the holiday was .... a product from Lab Series and Clinique ( WORTH EVERY DIME )

Sepintas Seni : Malam Nostalgia P.Ramlee

A little behind the scene photo of  C.U.T.E's "Sepintas Seni: Nostalgia P.Ramlee" courtesy of Ayyman Rahim. I actually had other plans that afternoon but it was cancelled at the last minute so I decided to give the seniors a hand in decorating the stage for the night's event. Well the seniors mostly did all of the work while I just stood there watching their creative minds explode. The only thing I remembered helping was helping Fahmi measure stuff.....with my hands as you can see in the picture above.

      The first phase of pre-production was not so stressful since the atmosphere the seniors gave during decorating the theatre room was a pretty calm and serene one. The second phase ( make up, costumes etc ) literally drain out all of my energy. Waiting for the juniors to arrive was terrible. I can understand that they had compulsory classes that they needed to attend to from 5 to 7. Some had spoken to me earlier that they would arrive around 7 PM which they did since they needed to go back to their house and pick up stuff. I seriously did not mind it. Atleast they have told me earlier that they will be late. The ones that really grind my gears was those that did not attended the 5 to 7 classes and arrived for make up and costume late. In fact, those that attended arrived earlier than they were but I'll talk about punctuality in another post in the near future.

      The event itself was great...I guess. Saying "I guess" since the only performance I get to watch was from the Music Department. Faizal did an awesome job though I still think his performance was the shortest. Everyone in the crowd think so too. I seriously thought that everything was okay. Even during my dance performance I did not bother looking out for my juniors if they forgot the choreography. For every performance that I have done so far, all that is in my mind is that to not trip and fall, do not forget the dance steps, interact with other dancers and audience and not to sneeze.

   Few of the performance performed that night. The first 2 is by the Theatre department while the last is from the Dance Department. I think they should of just used normal lighting during the Theatre performance though.

 The next day ( Wednesday ) a few people that were in the audience came up to me and asked whether the club would do another event like the previous one but with a K-Pop theme. Even my friend Firaz who is also in dance brought in his whole class to attend the event said that his classmates were asking him the same thing. I don't mind performing K-Pop songs since I myself am a big fan of the Korean Pop industry. I just hope that if everyone in the club agrees to do a K-Pop themed Sepintas Seni, they won't expect the dance department to do Gangnam Style. I don't mind for a "Sexy" theme as well though I won't be having high hopes for that one.

Not sure whether you can see the video or not but here's a link to Faizal's performance that got all the ladies and maybe a few gents melted in their seats.

As Fake as Pressed On Nails

Have any of you meet up with a total stranger, whom you and your FRIENDS have never met before acts so pretentious that you feel like you just want to run them over with a truck or push their fat ass down a hill ? I have. Let's call this person Blob.

I remember while waiting for the rest of the people to arrive for the meeting we were sitting in the theatre room. Blob came in later and sat behind us. We started talking you know, the usual stuff teens filled with rage usually do when all of a sudden he asked me a question. "Are we celebrating Q's birthday tonight ?" I told him that the plan was off since a friend of mine said so due to not knowing how many people would attend the meeting. Blob then started saying how my friend had texted him that the plan to celebrate Q's birthday was still on and that my friend had bought cake and stuff to celebrate. I told Blob that my other friend that texted him did not send me any text. Then the unthinkable happened.... "Oh I forgot, you guys are still newbies in this club's social circle so you guys wouldn't know much" . 

He is lucky to be alive today. I would off bitch slapped him to his death. I mean, I am not that pissed off that he said that but let's be logical now. We are off the same age, but I am a member of the club and have been friends with my 'friends for like four semester while he entered the university a semester later than any of us and has been a member for like three semesters. I've known my friends too well to not to tell me about celebrating our friends birthday and yes we did not celebrated my friend's birthday that night.

The other day I told my friends about it. All of them gave a shocked and disgusted look. "Who the hell is he to say that to you....He is not in our social circle....We're not even close...That's so embarrassing!" was what most of the girls said.

The point of this post is that you should never be pretentious. You should never act like you are a prestigious kid from a high end family. You should never act like one of the people from Gossip Girl just so that people will like you for who your are NOT ! You might be a hot shot where you are from but honey, you are in a University. A public one might I add. Nobody gives a damn if you attend those parties with champagne or gold plates. If you do so when you meet people for the first time and brag about your life, people will seriously have a negative review about you. Instead of getting "Wow I am so jealous of ******* life" said behind your back, you will mostly get a "Oh my God, why did he act so fake?" , "He was trying so hard to impress but his fake-ness shine through" and "I know him, my friends know him. He's a nobody". Burn..

I mean, sure entering University means meeting up with new people and creating a brand new image for yourself but that does not mean to fake it till you make it. All it means is just to improve yourself as a person from who you already are. Be more open with people. Be friendlier with people around. Participate in all sorts of activities. Not to tell people about your fake social life and social background cause anywhere you go, there will always be a person who really knows you for who you are.

I would listen to my friends talk about the events they had attended. The parties, the people. And I would tell them about mine even though mine is not as high standard as they are but at least it is real and we do have proof for the things that we talked about. Its not lame to ask your friends about the parties they attend and who the people they have met are. I seriously do that since I live far away from most of them so things are a bit different. My friends would straight away explain to me about A, B C and Z.

Why suffer yourself by spending a large amount of money when you know the money is actually for your monthly spendings ? Why spend a large sum of greens on branded clothes just to impress people ? By all means, if you like them and think its worth it go ahead and hand in your credit/debit card as you exit the store. If not, just save it for something else. Something that you really need. 

Another thing, just because you want people to like you doesn't mean that you have to ask them out for lunch every single day. Its bloody annoying. Shows off how desperate you are in need of their presence. Asking people out for lunch once or twice a week is enough. I don't even do that. Cause I know that if I spend too much time with my friends, the excitement of being friends will cease to exist and you will start to get bored and fed up with your friends.

I have been abusing " As fake as pressed on nails" for countless of time now. Now you know.

Constructive Criticism My Foot

Hey everyone, how are you guys doing ? I'm loving my classes so far though we have not really started our lessons yet. Most of it were just introductory to the classes and what the class is actually about. No this is not a post about my classes or how a majority of my lecturers are down right hilarious.

I don't get people that does something horrible to us and after a few weeks, would come to us or text us a message and tell us they are sorry for what they did, that they were just angry at us for no reasons or tell us other bull shit why they did it in the first place and hopes that we would befriends with them again. Being a saint that we are, we would always forgive them and bring them back to our lives.....

But I know that everyone that does so, in the end gets hurt once more. Its like a girl being blinded by love. She broke off with her boyfriend who cheated on her with another girl or he was abusive to her but in the end, when the guy gave off a few sweet words, the girl will be swept off her feet. Typical. The girl would remember the good old days that they had and think that the guy has really change when in fact, the guy just hurts her all over again and round goes the cycle of how stupid the girl is.

"I'm sorry. I promise I won't do it again" says A.... 3 weeks or a month or two later A would hurt us again. Trash talk about us behind our back. ... then ask for our forgiveness again. It is just like the cycle of how stupid the girl is but this time, its the cycle of how stupid WE are. Why do we forgive and introduce those type of people back in to our live ?  A teacher of mine once said just forgive the person that has done you wrong but never introduce them into your life again unless they are worthy.

This happens a lot in University. I know a few people that hate or dislike this group but they don't show it to others. Its just a feeling of knowing. They would act all sweet and friendly at this group but when they see an opportunity to attack or see the group being attack by others, they waste no time to enter and trash talk or give a so call 'constructive criticism' to the group. Knowing those people, I know that their true intentions are not to give constructive criticism but too trash talk about them.

When comparing let's say a Choir group with another choir group, we should never say that "Oh choir group A is so much better than your choir group. Why aren't your choir kids as discipline as Choir group A? They have other priorities too but they can still perform well with little practice?......." What we should say is that choir Group A is better than your group but you should follow in their foot steps and not look down at yourself or your group and be all emotional.

To be honest I seriously cannot stand how stupid or mentally retarded people are when it comes to criticizing  others negatively just because they hate them. Why ? Your constructive bull shit is not constructive at all. People outside might see this from your point of view. Your point of view of "I don't like you so I'm going to say negative comments but say you can't handle constructive criticism when you cry or be emotional" point.

Not saying this because you're doing it to a friend of mine or what but because you are an idiot. Why do so ? Do you think when others hear or see what you have done you think that they are going to support you? Sure those that have the same feeling as you would stand by your side but how about the rest ?

The truth is, I am doing this because I hate your attitude. You are as fake as pressed on nails. You should say what you mean but don't say it mean. Everybody knows deep down inside how you truly feel about others and how crappy your attitude is.

Evening Sky

Evening Sky by Ailee is just beautiful !

Well I am back here on campus for my 4th semester as a Diploma in Statistic student. Placed in the same room with the people from last semester minus Ayie. So it is just Mizan, Faidhi and I. A junior was supposed to be in our room but apparently he is a  no show so we decided to turn the extra desk and locker into a food storage. Mizan and I seriously thought that we were gonna stay on the second floor....We got a room on the third floor instead. Fought over the bottom bed with Mizan but in the end I got it since I bought candy canes for him.

The floor mates are a bit difficult this semester though. A few of the rooms are filled with my friends while others filled with juniors, ego heads and unknown people. Maybe it is still to early for them to strike up a conversation with any of us. They would usually give us a stare or a heads up when they see us in the hallway or in the toilet.

Most of the guys were surprised when I entered each and everyone of their rooms just to invite them all for dinner since I rarely hang out with any of them. I think It was because I was too bored and that I was influenced by the Real Housewives series. In every episode of each series will have the ladies attending 2 or 3 dinner parties ! Did the same thing again for tonight. Had dinner with the guys at Akira and no its not a Japanese restaurant. Earlier we went to the local chain store and bought lots of instant food and drinks. The only thing consumable in our room before we went on our shopping spree were my Chinese herbs, candy canes and sparkling water. Now we have hot chocolate, cookies, oreos, instant noodles and some more cookies.

Basically I did nothing today except had lunch with Ayman and meet up with Tyka to hand in our registration form. Ate lunch at this one stall near campus where it served cat fish. I could not care less about being drenched in my sweat since the food there was so good. Talked about stuff normally girls would talk about but in a different point of view. We even gossip about people and also talk a about our clubs future.

The only downside for today is that the internet services for our smart phone sucks big time especially in the library. Honestly, I thought I was going to die of boredom sitting in the library unable to do anything since my phone could not receive any signal while Ayman keeps on scrolling down Instagram on his iPhone while Tyka does the same with her note. Even at the Student Centre my blackberry was kinda useless.  It literally took me 20 minutes to successfully send a message to my friends and some completely ignored me once i was able to reply them thinking that I ignored them after receiving their instant messages.

I was planning on sleeping in early today, wishing everyone good night at 10:30... its already 45 minutes past midnight ! I have to wake up early tomorrow to get my student discount card around 8:30 since I don't want to stuck in line all day. Hopefully not many students wake up early tomorrow. But since I cannot sleep, I decided to watch this movie called ParaNorman. So far so good. All I understand so far is this kid Norman can see dead people and weird stuff and he has no friends except for this one fat kid who has all sorts of medical problems.

Dragging Myself Back to Campus

The time has come for every diploma student of Uitm that are on their semester break to go back to their respective campus. I am one am happy to go back since I don't do a lot of stuff back home since most of my friends are at different University and have different holiday schedules. The ones that do have the same schedule as I do are tired of looking at my face five times a week. The only thing that I do during my break is watch a movie or two with my friends, breakfast,brunch,lunch,dinner dates, parties, yoga and pilates and my frequent periods.

At first I was going to do a post about "What You Should Bring Back to College" post. But then I got bored half way into explaining why my bed sheets are bright and pink. So I decided to write a post about the things that I am doing ( some already done ) before going back to campus.

1. Listing

Yes listing. In order to prevent myself from over spending cash at the mall for essentials, I would make a list, the night before. A list of things I really need for college such as medicine, hot packs, cotton bud, stationeries and such. Without a list, I seriously know that I would go and buy something stupid and really inconvenient like a Yoga mat or a teddy bear. If you're a shopaholic like me, you might want to make a list yourself unless you leave everything to be done by your parents.

2. Dorm Room

For my university, when you arrive on campus, students that are staying on campus need to register themselves at counters stationed just outside of our college/dorms. For that I have only prepared 3 passport size photo of myself...That's about it. For my room I have already packed my bed sheets, pillow case and blanket since my pillows are already there. I am also bringing a bunch of anti-pest stuff since at some level of the dorms, the level of pest annoyance is really high and I really need my beauty sleep at night so the best to do is exterminate them once I've reached my room.

3. Results

Printed out my results for the first time. This is literally the first time I have printed out my results transcription. Before, I would have asked my classmates to do it for me since I am just too lazy to hit the printer's 'On' button. Printed out a bunch of them not because I am proud of them or anything but for preparations in case they are needed.

4. Class Registration

I decided after saying "I am switching class next semester" and not actually doing it for the past 3 semester, I have decided to switch classes. For my course, there are 7 classes A - G. I have been in D for 3 semesters. At first it was all good.You know, first semester, new experience, new friends. Then came second semester and a majority of the boys switched classes. Most of them had said they could not stand the girls in D and also they wanted to be with their friends 24/7. I did not mind since 3 of my friends were still in the same class. Then 3rd semester came...I was the only guy in the class. My three friends I mentioned earlier all transferred to a different class. I'm okay with being the only one caring testosterone in the class since my cousins are mostly girls. But it was seriously difficult for me to study alongside with my classmates, doing projects and group works and stuff. So I decided to transfer to my room-mate's class instead. Not only because of being lonely but also because I am taking Algebra for the second time and most of my course mates in C have not taken Algebra. In other words, I wont feel left out. Not that I was so in D.

5. Class Schedule

Since I am switching classes, I can no longer rely on the girls for class schedules. Usually they would make our class schedule, colour code it and post it up on our group page on Facebook. Now I have to do everything on my own. Since I am taking Algebra, I had to register for a class outside of my programme. I registered with students from Computer Science since I already know a few of them. This part was the most serious as I only had 2 choices. Either B or C. If I choose B, my Sunday would totally be free. If I choose C, my classes in one week would be divided equally. For those of you that don't know, classes/working days here in Kelantan starts from Sunday and ends of Thursday. In the end, I decided to choose B meaning my Monday and Wednesday would be packed but I would have Sunday off. Giving me 3 days off per week which is great. I won't be so stressed out for this coming semester. I colour coded Algebra on my schedule with my favourite colour to remind myself never to repeat the same mistakes. EVER ! I just hope that there wont be any changes in the schedules.

6. Yoga & Pilates

I've been doing a lot of these lately. Even attended 'Boot Camp'. but I did skip ONE WHOLE WEEK OF DOING NOTHING. So everything literally came back. So this week I am trying real hard. Doing Yoga, Pilates, Stretches and such. I plan on doing more jogging and running once I am in Kelantan since my housing area here is filled with wild dogs. These dogs are skinny and hungry, if they see me running it would be like watching Roast Beef running around the street. They would chase me to death. But I am kind of satisfied with what I have been doing since I finally fit into those small sizes and jeans .

7. Secret Spendings from Parents

I have also been buying a few new clothes behind my parents back. No I am not stealing their money. I have been planning on doing a shopping spree for a while so I have been saving a lot from last semester. Bought jeans, some polos, new perfume... Also got a new hair cut since the saloon at Kubah messed up my hair.Not getting my hair done there anymore. Even the regular hair stylist I go to commented on my hair. Mostly he said it was messed up! I kind of wished I did not spend it all though. I could really use some cash right about now.

8. Made new Friends

Surprisingly I have made a lot of new friends. Not to brag but literally! Hoping one of them is the 'ONE' . 

Well that's what I have been doing so far. Till then ....

Internet Friends

Hey there, I've been away from the blog from quite some time now. I know everyone's been refreshing my blog every time its 11PM ( I mostly update/write post around 11 PM ) to see whether a new post or article is up. I am so sorry if you did . . . . . Yes I know, I am being lame. Doesn't hurt to try and pretend you have lots of readers.

A few hours ago ( procrastination ) I was scrolling around Daily Booth website, trying not to cry as every one I know there uploads their 'Last/Final Booth' since we've all received e-mails from the site saying that it was about to closed. I bet you guys think this is post is going to be about  Daily Booth huh? . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . WRONG ! I was about to but then I stumbled upon a picture where a friend of mine just liked. http://dailybooth.com/TheCamCamera/30743246 . Not sure if you can view it without an account from the site. This person's newest/current booth was a picture of him and his friends with a little description of "I cant think of a better way to say bye...  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wLffpRZVdko " 

Before clicking it I was like thinking to myself what song does this guy wanted people to listen to. Cause most people on the website would post a "Good Bye" picture with a link to a song they think is appropriate. When I finally clicked it due to my curiosity, it was not a link to some random indie band song. It was a video recorded by the guy himself ( The Cam Camera ). It was a video of him and his ONLINE/INTERNET friends hanging out together for a week and a half! 

I was amazed at how much fun they had during that period of time. I know right? Internet Friends? Isn't that dangerous ? Its risky I know. But I feel that with Daily Booth and especially Skype, you can really know a person and see and processed in your mind whether or not this person is actually a perverted 60 year old men or a cougar or a paedophile. Just watch the video and you'll know what I mean.

Before I started doing this post, I did some research. ( A mere 15 minutes of googling on the subject ). I actually googled "Meeting Internet/Online Friends" and yes I only read 2 or 3 links. There was this one particular article by about.com and it was really interesting and not weird and not about the WHOLE experience of meeting online friends. Basically the article was about the precautions that you need to take before meeting someone you have NEVER met before and only know about thme via Facebook or Twitter etc.

One of the few things they have mentioned was to meet your 'friend' at a really open and public place, a coffee shop for example. And the FIRST meeting should only be an hour so that you can go back home and revise back on whether or not you should continue the friendship and stuff. You can seriously learn a lot about someone just by talking and listening to them in one hour. Just tell your friend that you only have an hour to spare and you have to be somewhere else later on. Most importantly, DRIVE YOURSELF. Doesn't take a genius to know that. If you don't want to spend an hour of coffee and pricey bread you can find some common interest with them and plan an activity. Something that you both might like and get to know him there. The mall, golf course, tennis court. I don't think a dance club or someone's party is included.

If your friend is of country or state, try and see whether you have any mutual friends with him or her. If so, get a little information about them. With information, you will be more confident and at ease to meet with that someone. Also on a first meeting, DON'T spill out everything. You just met them for 5 minutes and you are already crying about your ex-boyfriend. Think of it as a blind date... Unless you've mention about your activities and life on Daily Booth like most people do and they ask you about it. But still, don't share too much.

Even I myself try and do this myself. I try not to be so clingy to a person I've just met. Its just weird. You just met them and all of a sudden you are trash talking your old friends. Trash talking about your enemies with new people is also a BIG NO NO. It just shows what a terrible person you are.

See what happens when I do not do any research about a certain topic ? The post just goes from As to all of a sudden the Eiffel Tower. I really do think that it is cool to meet with your internet friends. IF you really know them. I won't meet someone unless I've done the video call with him on Skype or we have mutual friends. But still, meeting everyone at the same time at a party or event will just be plain out weird. I don't want to attend some huge event and just meet my internet friends for like 5 seconds and all we said was "Hi" "Bye". What's the point then? I want to sit down and have a salad with them and learn more about them. I just refuse to attend events such as TweetUp where all Tweet Heads meet up at a place and just have fun party get followers etc. I'm not a party pooper, I do parties ( with or without appearance fees ). But when it comes to meeting new people/friends, I rather do that at some place that is peaceful and also public so that if they try to kill me, I'll have random people around me. Pretty sure I am going to meet a few new faces during my mid semester break later on. Who knows. But truth be told.... who the hell wants to hang out with me during my break right ? I'm a mess. I'll spazz out and talk non-stop and might even creep them out. Till then.

People of The Past Facing Extinction

There's a little bit of exaggeration with the title. What I mean by people of the past is people with proper manners and awareness of their surroundings and when I say "facing extinction" I really do mean it. Proper manners in this post does not mean to know which fork out of the hundreds of forks on your left and right to be used when eating chicken, no. Here, it is about holding the door for someone entering or exiting a store or building. Saying please when asking for something or assistance and thank you after receiving something or a service. Respect when someone older or more experience is talking or explaining something. By all means you have the right to speak out your mind and express your own opinions on certain issues but that doesn't mean you can just simply cut off a person when they are talking. It is not an arduous task to raise up your hand and say " Excuse can I ... ?" "We can also..." . Some people might allow you to speak your mind during their time while some will give you the opportunity to do so once they are done talking.

Since I have been in University for a year and a half now, I can actually see that people of such good manners and etiquette are facing extinction. Not just the state where I am studying but also in my own home town. One of the most obvious is that only a few people from what I have seen hold the door open for others to enter or exit a place. Not trying to brag but I DO hold the door open for other people be it at the Convenience store, class, library or even at the library. I don't understand how people that knows people are walking behind them can just simply push the door open and hastily enters the room so that they would not hold the oh so heavy door for others. It is kind of hysterical when you do it to your friends which I am guilty of doing a few times. But seriously, some people they can just let the door close in and smack the people behind them on the face. To be honest, I have received a lot of different and how you say unique reactions when I hold the door for some people. Its normal to receive a "Thank you" or a smile from someone when you hold the door or even the elevator for someone. I have seen ( I think ) it all. A thank you, whether it be the short thank you or the long thank you with rhythm and tune but there at times, I would get giggles or even laughter. Seriously. I am holding the door for you so it would not smack you in the face cause I seriously push the door wide open with great force. I am not doing it because I think you are cute ( cause you are certainly not ) or have a petty monkey crush on you. I am doing it out of honesty and kindness cause I know it will somehow in some way will help you. Most of the people that say thanked me for what I do are usually adults. MOST not all. This does not mean students or youngsters do not know how to be grateful.

Again, I am not doing it for the thanks or trying to show off to people that I am a gentlemen which I am certainly not ! But is it that difficult to say "Thank you" ? I can hear you saying "Kansahamnida" or "Anyeohasaeyeo" through out your visit to the place but a single thank you whether it is in your language or English is not heard at all. You are tired, yes I do understand that with bills to pay, deadlines, rehearsals, quizzes and tests. But seriously ? Saying it does not even burn calories ! Even a single smile or tilting your head to the side will also do. Not just with holding the door for someone but also when receiving informations. There has been countless of times when I am at the office and unintentionally ease dropping to what the fellow student next to me is talking ( asking ) with the staff about something. Not only did they not say thank you after receiving VALUABLE information but they also asked the question in a rudely manner. I usually make a face every time people do that. I would be standing in front of the counter asking the staffs about something and a girl ( or a guy ) would just come up and ask their questions to the staff in front of them. If there was an "Excuse me" or "May I ask" ( in your own language or dialect ) its fine. But if you ask with an angry bossy attitude, that is just plain rude. Not trying to involve the parents ( I have to actually ) but haven't your parents teach you to say " Please", "Thank You", "Excuse/Pardon me" ? Regardless whether you are in a hurry or not. I feel like before entering University a student should do a Manner/Obedience Etiquette test to see if they are eligible to enter a higher educational institution.

Moreover, there has been a lot of complaints on social networks ( where else ) where students do not respect other students in the library/study room/study hall . Back then when I was aged 8 or 10. Security would be walking around in the library, monitoring people whether they are disturbing others ( making noise, talking loudly, laughing ) or really studying. Now if they were studying or reading books quietly, they will never bother you but if you make noises, loud jokes and laugh hysterically like a mad men, they would either "Shsss" you or throw you out of the library. Cause seriously, the library is there for you to study, get further information about a topic. Not chit chatting with your mates or tell your other half you love them till the end. I am really really surprise that in University, people do so ( making loud noises, laughing, cracking jokes the works ). I don't even know who invented the "Library is a Cool Place to Hang Out" syndrome. You can talk in the library but must the whole campus know that you are frustrated with your boyfriend for not saying " I love you " after you were on the phone with him in the library ? Must you shout at your friend asking them the answer to question number 4 when they are 5 7 tables away from you? I honestly think that people that do so does not know the meaning of the word embarrassment and also selfish. Talking loudly, shouting and not caring what others think is NOT being yourself. You are actually being a target of negativity and getting glares and demonic stares from others around you. I have sat next to a course mate of mine once in the library and she would be shouting to our friends , teasing them about what our friend just tweeted and afterwards she would be all "Urgh people are just so annoying. I didn't do anything wrong, why are they glaring at me. Omg this is the library, study, read books don't stare at me". Yes my course mate is that dumb in a different level.

For finals, my friends and I have been visiting the study hall/room for countless of times since the space is not small so not many people can use it and also we thought it was more quieter since rude people are busy having a concert at the library. It was true. It was peaceful there....during daylight. But when the clock strikes 9 PM, this massive group of seniors of the same course would enter the room, with their Mc Chicken Deluxe, Slushies, Waffles, Fried Rice and the list just doesn't stop. At times, they would make a face and exit the door if there is not enough space for their clan. But when all of them are in that room, they act as if they are in a mixer or small gathering party. They would just ignore those that have their study mood on and laugh at stupid jokes, teasing each other, yelling at one another and so on. What is it with people not being able to respect others? Respecting others does not only refer to respecting those in a higher position or the elderly, it also means respect others when you are in the library by being quite and not make a scene or loud noises. Respecting others in the public toilet by flushing after doing your business. Respecting others at a fast food joint by not cutting in line. They would also have the nerve to say "Ooops, sorry for being noisy" when they notice us looking at them for being loud but 39 seconds later, they would repeat !

Cutting in line is another thing. I remembered one time when I was with my friend at this shaved ice stall and a group of girls would come by and just cut us in line. Without even looking at us. Behind me was 3 6 other people and when I took a peak, I can seriously see the anger on their faces. I too am feel with rage because my friend and I have been in line for 10 minutes and all of a sudden, these girls just skip in front of us throwing pixie dust around. Even my friend gave a disgusted look and snorted. Instead of murdering the girls in my head, I seriously did what any adult would do. " Excuse me, some of us have been in line for 10 minutes and it is really rude of you girls to simply cut in line of us" . All they did was gave a 'shock' face and when the owner asked what was going on, people behind me were yelling "They cut line" "Its not fair" . So the owner told them to go back of the line or they would not be serve. They put on a pretentious face and tried to be as genuine as possible and said sorry to everyone. Once I had gotten my drinks, I notice that the girls were pointing one another, blaming each other for cutting lines. I think they gave me the shock face cause I literally told them off in English cause I knew they would of just ignored me and gave me the cold shoulders if I told them in Bahasa. Not saying that English is more powerful though. I just feel like I had to do so.

This does not occur to most of us but it does to me. People being tardy for practice. I seriously cannot tolerate it. I am a junior myself so I don't burst into flames every time someone is late for practice. Its not difficult to have an early dinner or text the seniors that you are going to be late. If not, everyone would just be sitting on the floor, waiting for the 'divas' to arrive. It really does waste precious practice time. Do not complain about finishing practice late if you are unable to be arrive on time yourself.

This post is way over due. I have been meaning to do this post right after my holiday started but I was just too busy with work and also I forgot about doing it so I ended up making posts on other stuffs ( rants ) .

Cliques, Social Groups and Peers

Everybody knows about it. Everybody has seen it happened whilst growing up and I am pretty sure every one has gone through or face it. Cliques.

Some of you may think that cliques and social/peer groups are the same thing but truth be told, they are not ! Social groups for example a team of football players. Sure they practice with each other almost every day on the same field, with the same groups of people and also with the same coach ! But not all football players of the same team hang out with each other outside of practice. Sure the whole group might get invited to an awesome party but that's just about it. They are friends do not get me wrong but they are not just as close of best friends or cliques. Why you may ask, who knows. Its just life. In my opinion with me being a member of the dance club, I mostly 'hang' out with most of the members during practice and at times when we have an event in one week, I would start spending more time with them. Its cause during that 1 week I will be so busy that I would not have much time to spend with my 'close' friends so therefore I just go out eat lunch, dinner and pray with my dance members. No this is not the case of "looking for other people when you are left out" scenarios. Since I don't have time to spend with my friends, might as well just spend it with my dance mates for the time being, its not leaving your friends for other groups of friends and when the event is over, we would say our good byes and reunite once there is another upcoming event. I do this because I want to have my own space. If I hang out with the same people 24/7 I would seriously vomit every time I hear a dance track. Still I do hang out with them when they asked me out for dinner. I mean who would reject having dinner with great and understanding people ?

Back to the topic. When I first entered University I seriously did not expect to be reintroduced into the world of Cliques/Social Groups. I thought everything was in the past. University is where you just make new friends, study, join activities...that's it. Boy was I wrong. Its not really reintroducing me to this world. Its more of introducing really since the social groups in University is totally different from those in High Schools. They are more evolved and advanced. Back in High School you would have the "Popular Girls", "Wannabes", "Bullies", "Jocks", "Nerds", "Norms", "Emo Kids" .... In University you have none of the above. In University, my campus anyway there's the "Performing Arts Kid", "We Stick Together Forever Girls", "Rising Wannabes", "Fashionista Wannabe", "Religion Extremist", "We'll Contact You if We Need You Guys", "Batch/Course Kids", "Divas", "Modern", "Locals" and the list just goes on and on.

There was a time where I mostly spend my time with group A so so much that when I asked my room mates out for dinner, they would asked me "Oh what happened to ______?" "Oh not eating with them tonight?". Because of this I started detaching myself from the group not because of peer pressure but mostly the reason being that a particular group, will not always be there for you. What happens if you are so so attach to this one group OUTSIDE of your programme that you don't even bother to be friends with the people in your programme let alone your own room mates that one day, the group that has always been there for you, says that they cannot help you with their problems. They have other things to do. Who can you turn to ? If you are one of the lucky ones and people in your programme still likes you even though you don't spend an inch of your time with them like me,then you are okay. What if you're not? I am so grateful that my room mates and my course mates were all so nice and caring. When my room mates asked "Do you have a problem?" Its like Allah answered my prayers and pushed them towards me. Still this does not mean now I only attach myself with my course mates. Its kinda difficult for this semester since I am the only guy in class. But during free periods I would spend my time in the library with other people from my programme. Teaching one another about what we do and do not understand. This is what creating a bond means.

I seriously disagree with some assumption of bonding with someone requires a lot of time, hard work and effort. Lunch dates, study dates, dinner dates, meeting dates and all the dates that exist in the world. I also partially disagree to those that says you should only be friends with those that you truly trust or deem worthy of your friendship. Some might say, be friends with everybody even if you hate them. Some interpret this as being friends with someone you had a hustle with, asking them to have lunch with you, hang out and what not but at the same time still have the sense of hatred and negativity towards that friend. I seriously learn this the hard way. So what I will do is still acknowledge the existence of the people that I hate. Greeting them, giving them hand gestures and stuff but just that. Cause I seriously cannot tolerate people that you've forgiven but all of a sudden does another stupid thing.

Back in High School, social groups USUALLY never cause any strains between one another. But here on campus, I can seriously see the bad vibes between certain cliques, groups and clubs, You're a University student, if they do not have the same view as you no matter how accurate you are, let them be. If one individuals does not agree with you it does not mean his whole club shares his points of view. What I learn in Research Methodology is that not every one has the same point of view. Everyone has their own opinion due to their own unique way of thinking and viewing things. There is this one group where they only hang out with people from their batch and course. meaning if they entered Uni on April 2008, then they would only hang out with his course mates who entered in the same year/month. They would do whatever it takes to help their friends. I have seen up close at an event where group B was caught cheating due to their excessive number of members but this one guy suddenly erupts towards a friend of mine like a volcano. He was like yelling, pointing fingers at people. The same guy even said to his friend during 'Musical Chair' we should beat all of the juniors.....for pit sake its just a game !

By the time you've reached this paragraph you must be thinking that I have a huge circle of friends and that I am being friends with every body. That is where you're wrong sister. People that I avoid due to personal personal reasons are people that I can no longer forgive, Religion Extremist because some of them on my campus don't really analyse anything and shockingly at time bad mouth people *gasp*, Jerks, people that look for you if they want something and also trannies. Not being mean but seriously I am petrified of trannies. Not all but those thick guys thinking they're super models and wear skinny jeans and tight outfits when the truth is, their love handles are from left right, up and down, north south east and west. Its not that I hate their society I mean I can tolerate gays, bisexuals and lesbians but the T in LGBT, I just cannot. Some might say "Izzat you fit in perfectly with them" No I would not. I don't wear make up to class, I smile at people not glare and I don;t burst out into Sheila Hamzah, Dyg Nur Faizah etc in public.

In conclusion, I think that no matter what, you should never attach yourself with one social groups or cliques. Well this is my opinion anyway. If you have a different opinion, its up to you. Pretty sure afterwards a few chavs would do unmentions and tweet all negativity about me. Who cares ;)

A Post Everyone Can Relate To

Getting our hopes up. Face it ! We are all guilty of having our hopes and dreams high up in cloud nine. You'd be lying if you say you NEVER had high hopes before. Putting your hopes really really high is like a gamble. Its like stacking a domino one by one. If just one domino falls to the front or the back, its over! To give you guys a clear view, I really had high hopes for my SPM results back then, thought to myself if results are good enough, I might try and get a scholarship of some sort, get into a good programme that I like and the list goes on and on. I even googled companies that would give out scholarship for students furthering their studies in certain programmes. But then, the very first piece of the domino placed way back suddenly got blown by the wind and knocks over the other pieces. My results were not that superb. I only got As ( grateful ) for the easy subjects... The same thing also happened for my first semester results in Uni. Everyone was happy updating their tweets, blackberry messenger's status, facebook status etc about how fabulous their CGPA was while I stand behind everybody else barely holding a fake smile.

From then onwards, I decided that I should never EVER have high hopes or even dream big. I did not like the feel of pain that came with it. To me, after failing to achieve what you wanted so badly has its phases. One of the common phase is the "Its ok, I should move on" phase where I usually just get up, put on a genuine smile and convince every one that I'm fine. The next phase after that is the "What if" phase. Thoughts of ' the other outcome ' slowly pops in my minds a day or two after the first phase. I would start imagining scenes of what would happen if I achieved my hopes and dreams. Lastly, there's the oh so famous "I'm All Emo, Sad and Fragile" phase where I would buy take outs,take them to my room and eat it alone and cry while doing so. I would also silently cry myself to sleep thinking about how much of a failure I am. There's also the rare occasion of taking a shower and crying at the same time. Most people never notice this because I usually shower earlier than some. Well actually the last phase is really getting off your bum and move forward.

The MAIN reason I wanted to do this post was not about being all negative and not having dreams. The real  reason why I am making this post because I slowly started having high hopes for a certain someone. To tell you guys the truth, I did not have high hopes of developing feelings for this person at all. All I wanted was a companion that would just listen to how my day went and listen to my endless amounts of complaints. Because I know that having high hopes that a certain someone will love you back BUT in the end you find out that they don't hurts like a female dog ! So I told myself that I will NEVER develop feelings for this person. I bet you know where this is going?.....................................................................................................................................................................................................................................I FREAKING DEVELOP FEELINGS FOR THIS PERSON.  I mean who in the right mind wouldn't ? Constant instant messages, comforts, late night calls! Big big mistake. Cause slowly I realise that person X still has feelings for their ex/crush. Because of this, gravity and mother earth literally pulled me back to earth and they pulled me hard! Fell flat on my face.Chest hurts, hearts starts to pump quickly and "You shouldn't of had high hopes for X" keeps playing in my head over and over followed by "See what you've got yourself into now?" and "You deserve it!" . I seriously thought that we would of been a 'thing'. I really really enjoy our conversations and instant messages.

I'm confused. You said you're trying to move on and I know that it is hard but still......What is it that we truly have. Can't you just tell me straight forward about everything. Clear up the air. So that I know where I stand in your life. Where I exist in your space. And yes, this is still the "I'm Having High Hopes and Dreams being with You" talking. The probability of that person reading this is really really REALLY low...you can't even find it in the Chi-Squared or Mann Whitney table ( Statistic Joke ) .


Should I let got ? Or should I keep having high hopes and dreams of being with this person ? Or should I just be straight forward with them ? If I do so, I might lose them as a good friend :( What do you guys think ? Tweet or comment or text or bbm or IM or DM me if you like.

Dusty Stove

Apparently my family and I have been eating out for almost a week now. No its not because my mom is too lazy or busy to cook, she's away attending to my dear sister who has puffy eyes or something. Pizzas, McDonald's, Chicken Skewers, Secret Recipe is what you get if you leave 4 guys alone in a house with no instructions on what to cook.

3 out of 4 ( including moi ) of those guys know how to cook but we are not told of where the vegetables, chickens etc are placed especially me since I just came back from a full semester of uni. As soon as dad arrived home after sending mom to the airport he asked us "Where do you want to eat tonight?" Out came Sushi, McDonald's, Pizza, Thai, Chinese and other. Don't get me wrong, I love eating out as much as cooking. Less dishes to clean, heck we don't even have to do the dishes if we eat out. No fuss and mess in the kitchen. The only thing is the amount at the end of the receipt !

Every time I go eat out in Kuching, I forget that the price of food here are not the same as they are in Kelantan. Drinks cost a mere RM 2 - RM 2.50 max in Kelantan while here they even cost around RM 3 to RM 5 ! I was surprised when I saw the price of Ayam Penyet here was 7 ringgit. I was about to yell at the owner at how obscured the price was but then I slowly remind myself about the price different of food here.

I am actually making this post because of the pain I feel every time I eat out with my family. Its as if I am ignoring all the pain and sweat that I drip every morning and evening after doing Pilates. Just imagine, doing 30 minutes to an hour of Pilates all flushed down the toilet with a single bite of a double cheese burger.

Still contemplating whether to eat out tomorrow at some fancy restaurant for Dad's birthday or have his son cook for him his famous pasta and spaghetti ... That reminds me, I have not gotten him a gift ! Till then....

Study Buddies

 I am more comfortable studying alone. If I don't understand about a subject I would either walk over to a friend's room or just bbm/text/whatsapp my classmates and hope that they read AND reply as soon as possible. Other than that, I am pretty I am fine studying on my own. If only I would study more seriously for those past quizzes and test. Sigh .

Still, no matter how antisocial you are, you still need atleast one study buddy with you to well you know study with you before and during finals. This post is way over due to be honest since this is actually a thank you post for my study buddies. I had in total of 8 study buddies. I didn't study with all of them at once. I mean what person in the right mind can study with that many people at once? Pretty sure there will be the occasional questions of "Are your lectrers good at their job?" "How's classes?" "When are you going back?" and the oh so dreadful "What is your carry marks for ....?"

2 of them are my classmates and close friends. 3 are my annoying yet helpful and funny room mates. One of them is this girl I usually gossip with on BBM and the last 2 are also a good friend of mine from another class and are a couple. Yeah I know I'm interrupting their study date but who cares ! I did not think myself as a third wheeler or whatever. I was more of a "I Don't Want to Repeat this Semester?Subject" kind of guy during the study session.

I'd study with my room mates late at night after I get back from the student lounge room studying there for 1 whole day. I usually study with them around 2 in the morning til 4 or 5 am. Usually study with the girls during week days when the sun is high up in the sky. We'd arrive at the library after breakfast and start our session till it's 4 or 5 PM and continue 7 pm to 12 am/1 am at the student lounge with the 2 couples . So my finals mostly consist of me waking up in the morning,food,study,food,study,shower,study,study inside the room,food sleep and repeat with praying in between.

Without my study buddies I would of never make it out of finals alive ! So thank you Nana,Nisah and Nonoy (Classmates/friends) , Aiman and Hasif ( Couple ) and Mizan, Ayie and Faidhi ( room mates )

Books in the air

*throws books up high in the air*

The day all 2011 Diploma in Statistics students have been waiting for is finally here! The day where we get to pack our bags, close our statistical tables and put away our calculators as we are done with our 3^rd semester!! Pretty sure a majority of us had our minds on the semester break when we really should have been focusing on our final paper for this semester (Business/Time Series Forecasting) which was really difficult for some and for those like me, well let’s just say that I am lucky I did not wet my pants or cry during the exam!

Had an early dinner at about 6:30 or so since I needed to pack for my flight tomorrow! I am kind of shock since I seriously did not bring that much clothes to campus this semester. Everything fits into one huge bag. From my daily wear to my night wear, boxers to socks, ties to cardigans. I don’t even know why I brought along 2 cardigans since I rarely wear them this semester. I only started using it nearing the end of semester since it’s starting to rain a lot (nearing rain season) and the weather gets pretty cold. I’m also pretty annoyed with the amount of black coloured t-shirts that I have in my locker. I don’t even know why I brought so much. Not just that insects like to hang around when I dry them, they also get white like strings and other white stuff attached to them from the washing machine. Really pisses me off to be honest.

It is kind of funny how a few days ago I was already planning on buying new clothes and re-start my wardrobe/closet. I seriously went on a budget this semester when it comes to outing, food etc. Laugh all you want, I even googled the stuff I should buy. Black is not an option since I have packed a lot of blacks this semester and only one word sums it all up….ANNOYING!  Either white strings of cloth or who knows what white stuff sticks at my black clothes every time I machine wash them. Kind of thinking hitting bright or pastel colours since they suit the rainy season that’s about to come for next semester. Hopefully my predictions are correct since it has been that way every year. Seriously hoping that I get the chance to visit a decent mall in town. Well every mall in town is decent, it’s just the people walking in it aren’t.

Cannot wait to go back home today (since it’s already midnight) and eat home cooked food and also make a mess in the kitchen myself. I’ve been dying to cook my own food since the beginning of this semester. Fast wifi, free food, air conditioning, extra car, parents, it’s no wonder why people studying nearby go back home every week. FUTURE LEADERS!

Kit Kat + Nutella + English Paper

Picture taken the night before my English paper. Was bored studying in text citations, currents issues memorising the dictionary . Decided to dip kit kat with nutella !! Weee~~ still have ulcers and its the 10th ! Been drinking water like crazy . Maybe because I don't sleep much this past 2 weeks . LIFE !!

Post "No Sleep for 2 days due to Algebra Finals"

Basically as the title goes, I did not SLEEP for 2 days and I am pretty sure that my batch mates that took Algebra this semester also did not sleep for 2 days. Well not sleeping is a bit of an exaggeration. We sleep but it lasted for only about 2 - 4 hours till we  started going through past year questions.

Pretty sure my roommates were tired of me moaning the same things over and over again . "Why didn't I study for the quizzes?" " Why was I not more focus in class?" "Why did I frequently SKIP class !" My carry marks for Algebra were like seriously low ! Almost cried at the library when my friend told me what mine was! I didn't though since the rest of my classmates also had low carry marks .Luckily we had 2 days to prep for the paper after Research and Islamic Studies. . Im saying as if those 2 days were enough ! I had actually did some early reading on Vectors during the gap between English and Research. I literally read the chapter from the crack of dawn till it was Magrhib ! Alhamdulillah I fully understand the whole chapter .Thank goodness all of my roommates went home during the gap as I seriously read the chapter out loud in my room.

To be honest, I was really jealous when I saw all my friends from different classes had their own study body while I was sitting alone doing exercises on Vectors. I was at the point where I wanted to go behind a rack and just cry my eyes out due to loneliness. But then it hit me, Ive tried studying in a group before...FAIL ! big time. But now that I am sitting all alone at the corner, I can seriously understand the theories and concepts on my own. I mean I did ask a few of them on certain things i did not understand but still, I can actually see results of me studying alone and in a group.I didnt even bother on going to the library during night time as it closes at 10. As soon as the the clock strikes 9.30 they would switch off the air conditioner, 9.45 they would play a song, signalling to students to exit the library immediately. Instead I went to the study lounge at the Student's Centre at 7.30 and study Algebra by myself till midnight. After that went back to my room, clean up, went to bed and wake up 3 4 hours later and repeat till it was the 8th !

Butterflies were in my tummy that morning. I seriously had a panic attack as I plan on not sleeping after studying from 6 to 7 but then went back to sleep till 8.20 so I was kinda panicking. But then I started playing random songs and just laugh all by myself. People were avoiding me but who cares. I still cannot believe that some of my friends still bring notes 30 minutes before the exam starts. I mean, do you really remember it? Does it really stuck in your head or is it just to satisfy yourself ?

As soon as the invigilator said "You may start" I quickly grab the piece of paper and quickly wrote down all of the formula for each chapter in order. Sad I did not focus on how to inverse a 3 by 3 matrix . I thought I knew how .  Everyone was relief that Algebra was over. Hoping I wont have to see it again next semester . Amin. Everyone updated their BBM status to "No more Algebra" :Bye Algebra" "Lol screw Life" "Algebra *Angel face*....... 2 hours later they updated "Omg so sick!" "Major Headache!" "I cant move!" ":S" . So so funny.

Mine came a bit later. Mine came 2 days later. Woke and BAMM got a major flu ! Couldnt climb out of bed. Like literally. Body was so weak that I had to asked my roommates to charge my phone, boil water etc lol. Thankfully I had some traditional chinese tea that my mom gave me. It works well when you have the flu . Felt better 2 hours later after consuming it and its not even bitter ! Its sweet like syrup .

It really hit me you know, yes burning the midnight oil just to PASS a paper is important but so is our HEALTH . We need to balance our schedule and make time for us to rest, eat, sleep and what not. Hope I'll do better next semester by not skipping class and study how I study for finals . Good luck to those that are facing their dreadful finals.

Finals....*faints*

As the title says, every UiTM ( Diploma students ) will be facing their final examinations starting this Monday ( 1/10/2012 ) . Seriously not that worried about my first paper since its English . The only thing I am worried about is remembering how to do a proper citations ! 

1/10 - English, 3/10 - SciTech in Islam , Research Methodology , 6/10 - Algebra ( Allah SWT help me )  , 8/10 - Statistical Method , 14/10 - Forecasting 

Just look at my schedule for finals ! Its  a mess ! The gaps between each papers are so small ! I would of prefer if my finals were like this 

1/10 - English  , 3/10  - SciTech in Islam, 6/10 - Research Methodology, 8/10 Statistical Method , 13/10 - Forecasting , 18/10 - Algebra

I mean just look at it ! The gaps between each paper, the order of subjects ! HEAVEN ! But nooo ! They just love making each subjects closer to one another ! How can I even survive day 2 of my finals ? I mean seriously ? Science and Technology and Research on the same freaking day ?! Pretty sure I'll be bringing a lot of tissues on that day . Lucky that I love Research and that the paper is at 2:15PM so there's a few hours for me to prep for it . I've been studying CTU ( SciTech in Islam ) for 3 days now .... I can barely remember anything . I think that I am ok when it comes to memorising but when it comes to names ....*hides under table* Like seriously all of the Historian's names are just so difficult for me to remember !

I am also worried about Algebra ! Since I missed a few classes *cough* diarrhoea *cough* dehydration *cough* ulcer *cough* lazy *cough . I am ok with the last 2 chapters to be honest but out of the 10 questions in finals.. those 2 chapters are asked ONCE !! I suck at Vectors big time and guess what, Vectors is asked 3 to 4 times ! Yay !

For Forecast and Statistical method I just need to shove every single formula into my brain and their concepts and Im ok :)

Praying to Allah SWT that I can improve my GPA . Amin :)

A dear old friend

A picture of my dear friend Abang Izzmin who passed away on October 21st 2012...I am not sure what caused his passing just that Allah SWT loves him more.

  Born on the 8th of April 1993, just 2 days before I was born . Bubbly, funny and at times just plain annoying, that is Izzmin. He would always laugh and make jokes out of everything .

   Our friend Zul was the one that told me that our friend had passed away. He called my cell at 11:47PM while I was busy studying for a test the next day. Hearing those words "....passed away" I could not feel anything, it was as if my motor skills were not working as the pens that was held in my hands fell off and the only thing that I could do was just breath..

  I did not cry at first. The first thing I did after getting off the phone with Zul was to call my parents and tell them about since our parents were friends since they were little. Hearing the voice of my dad, I immediately cry. I could not speak, I tried stopping but I just couldn't. The thought of my friend not being here with us saddens me.

  I actually plan on visiting him once I was done with third semester since I did not visit him during Raya holidays. Bringing home baked foods, we would just laugh and talk for hours.

 I really am thankful to have a him as my friend. If it wasn't for him, Im pretty sure I would not befriended his best friend Azri. Even though we went to different high school, we were close. Even when Im with them I can sense some sort of strong friendship between the two of them. Their friendship is like nothing you've ever seen. Whenever we go out, both of them would be in the same car. In extra classes, they'd be sitting next to each other. Sure it seems like the typical friendship but you've gotta see it in order to understand what I am trying to say.

  They would even at times gang up on me and make lame jokes about me. I would reply their petty jokes with a slap or even pinching their cheeks. Typical old me.Speaking of slapping, back in 2009/2010 Izzmin would be an abuse victim of my other late friend Yasmine and I. We would sit next to him and just toy around with him. We would be pinching his bubbly cheeks, pull his hair. I remember once that he'd try to counter our attacks and Yasmine would be like "Omg you're gonna hit a girl?!!" and *WHAM* hits him .

  I seriously could not imagine how Azri felt when he heard about the passing of his dear friend or when he arrived at his house and saw that the body was already in the van... Everyone keeps on mentioning about how strong their friendship is on Twitter. Everyone was worried about him on how he was coping with everything that has happened.

 Izzmin will be miss. I will try my very best to move on. I have clutch with reality on your passing my dear old friend but it still saddens me that you are gone. Im also sad that I could not see you for the last time..
   To Abang Izzmin...thank you for being such a good friend and for accepting who I am without judging me...Thank you.. Al-Fatihah.

 

Back to Reality

 Its been a week since I first arrived  here at Uitm,Machang,Kelantan. Im currently in my 3rd semester of my Diploma programme. I went here straight from my vacation trip with the family. We went to Langkawi so you can just imagine my locker here in my room fill with chocolates that I had bought during our trip to Langkawi.

 Currently staying in a room next to the room I had last semester which is located on the 2nd floor. To be honest, I was hoping to get a room at the Right Building but instead I got a room at the Left but it is fine since I dont have to climb up thousands of steps to reach my room. I actually fail to get a room cause I did not have enough coupons for me to get one but my Father called the management and I also had e-mail them about this and they gave me a second chance. I did not wanted to use C.U.T.E's help to get a room because I know of the 'consequences' if I do use their help.I am happy with my roommates so far. There are 4 of us in a room and all 3 of them are the anti-social type which is good since I love the quiet.

 I am loving my classes so far even though we have not officially start any lessons.Im also loving the lecturers in my class.A lot of them are funny and I can tell that I won't be sleepy in their class. So far the class that I am loving the most is English Academics and Statistic Method. My class schedule is not that pack except for Tuesdays where I have classes from 8AM till 10PM ! I dont mind the night classes though. It just means that I have an excuse to go to practice late on those days.

 I am also planning  on reducing my activities with C.U.T.E.. By that I dont mean to quit it entirely, its just that I wont be able to participate in any of the activities involving outside of campus and also for AKM and Pre-Graduation dinner which are always held outside of campus due to my parents wishes and I have to obey their wishes.

  C.U.T.E's first event will hopefully be next Wednesday which is "Malam Bersama C.U.T.E". For that event, future members/juniors are will get to see what the Cultured Unit Theatre club is all about. There will be a joint performance by all of the department excluding "Dikir Barat" as they will be introducing the 'joint' performance done by the people from all of the departments (Theatre,Dance,Vocals,Choir and Models) .
I am so happy that I personally created the 'mini' choreography for the Dance Department for the performance but I am not sure whether the seniors would approve of the steps. It took me 2 hours to create them and I press the replay button for like 50 times just to have a feeling of the song.

  So far I have not heard anything from I-Techqs (Academic club for Diploma in Statistics students) since most of the senior members are busy with post orientation week work and a few have not yet landed at Kelantan. Pretty sure it will be super hectic once .

Phase

I am pretty sure everybody wears different types of clothes/outfit as they grow up. (fashion phase) I know I experience this phase and I still do to be honest.

I can hardly remember the stuff that I wore when I was in Primary School. All I remembered was wearing those Polo shirts when I am out with the family or going to extra classes at school. Back then I did not care or give a them about fashion as testosterone has not kicked in yet when I was 7-12. There was also a phase where I started to wear mostly black or dark coloured outfits as they make me look slimmer and hide my extra 'friends' when I was in lower Secondary School.

I started to wear more of those checkered outfits as I was attracted towards its wide range of colours and tones. At times, I would wear a plain t-shirt and turn the checkered shirts as an outer wear. I was pretty self-concious of my body and I still do actually. I always buy 'L' size clothes even though medium and some times small fits me perfectly. I started wearing clothes that are NOT 'L' or fits me perfectly when one day a friend of mind was curious of why all of my clothes were a size 'L'. I told him I look fat in other sizes and that it was really comfortable. My friend told me that he has seen me topless and says that I look even fatter in those 'L' outfits.

I started looking at pictures of myself, which I rarely do and you know what I see ? It was if my face was edited on Rossie's body ! I know my body but the picture is me. The clothes that I wear basically either makes me look fat or huge or how Tyra would say it fiercely real. Guess what ? I do not want to look like that. So I started buying clothes that fits me perfectly. I have no idea why but I seriously cannot take my eyes off outfits that have Aztec prints or Red Indian inspired outfit. If you see me out of the house or room, you will notice that a few of my outfits have Aztec prints on them .

I am a sucker for those types of outfit every time I am in stores especially TopMan and Forever 21( yes they have a men's section thank you very much)

Right now I am trying to find a 'male' version of Spencer Hasting's outfit. I am seriously obsessed with her blazers,sweaters,knit wear,coats,jackets and everything else she has worn on Pretty Little Liars. I found those 'sailor' inspired blazers/jackets at this one store but then it was for the opposite sex and it was a size 3 lmao. Sadly F21 did not have them as well so I ended up not buying a jacket/blazer instead I bought something else .

3 vs 1

Its been 2 days since I got back from my 1 week trip to Kuala Lumpur. I was supposed to go there for 4 days to visit my cousin but then I was informed that my interview with UM was on the 24th so I extended my stay there.

Some of you might know why I put the title of this post as "3 vs 1" . For those that don't, it basically means 3 Panels of Interviewers against me (1). I was not nervous at all for the interview as I had already prep for it a few days ago and did some of my research. As I entered the room,there were 3 SERIOUSLY different looking people sitting across the room ( Interviewers ) . One of them was a guy who was a lecturer there in his late 30s.The one sitting in the middle was also a lecturer(Malay) and I am pretty sure she is also a nurse there and the last panel was a Chinese Nurse. I was kinda happy that one of the interviewer was a Chinese cause I can freely speak in English cause at first I thought the session was going to be fully conducted in English but to my surprise  , the other 2 asked questions in Bahasa so I was kinda shock as I thought it was going to be fully in English but again thank goodness the last interviewer was there.

The first question kinda had me stuck . "What have you prepared for this interview?" Now if the question was in English I'd be able to answer it but then it was asked in Bahasa so I kinda froze for a while. I pulled myself together and started talking about a few research I have done about nursing. How it is in high demand in our country especially male nurses and also about the discriminations of nurse. There were also question of where I see myself in 5 years from now,my view on men judging male nurses,worst part of nursing and also the Million Dollar question of why I want to become a nurse.

Basically the interview went well ( I hope ) . Results are out in June . Hopefully I'll get into the programme since it has been my dream to work in that particular profession .

I Seriously have no idea what to do during this holiday. I usually cook random stuff when Im bored. Hence the pictures above are some of the food that I make myself :).... minus the raw chicken :p

Procrastination at its best !

The first 2 papers which was English and Islamic Studies was ok since they were basically needed memorisations and stuff.

I was also not scared preparing face finance since I had finished all of the past year questions and also all of the exercises and because it is the subject I was most focus through out the semester. I was also prepared cause some of my friends were able to help me with the first few chapters which I suck. Thanks again you guys !

It was for the other 2 subject I was worried about, Calculus 2 and Probability Statistics. I seriously have not done a single past year question for any of the 2 subject. I literally deleted every info I knew about the subjects and start from SCRATCH ! I literally had only 5 days to prepared for all 3 papers including Finance. My friends helped me out a lot with statistics. Hanisah,Nonoy and Apan basically explain to me about it from chapter 1 until chapter 6.The night before the paper I did not know what I should be doing so I took out my coloured pens and a piece of paper and wrote down all the equations and situations and just memorised it.Did some questions and slept at 4 in the morning and woke up at 10 and did the same thing till it was time to face the paper. To everyone's surprise I exited the exam hall 40 minutes earlier than scheduled. It was ok since I did not leave out any questions unanswered.

For Calculus 2 it was a bit different. No matter how much they explain it to me I still was unable to do any exercises. I actually gave up at one point and just focus on Chapter 5 and Chapter 3 because from my little research,80% of the questions are from those chapter.As usual slept at 4 am and woke up at 10. Sadly I did not exit the hall early because it was really difficult! The paper consisted of only 60% from Chapter 5 !I even leave out a few questions.

Hopefully I PASS the 2 last subjects :)

Should I like or dislike

Basically I procrastinate a lot for my second semester of University. Maybe it was because I was so caught up with Dance,CUTE and helping out with events for I-Techqs. With so many things to do. Studying just seem irrelevant at that time.

I even skip classes when I dont feel like going to one. Im practically lost when Im in Probability and Statistics class. At first I was ok with everything but then most of the events and performance were on Wednesday so I am mostly absent for that class on Wednesday. This caused the lecturer to start talking about how I am always absent for her class,I look tired,not interested in the subject etc etc. To be honest, I actually never felt that way about her class until she open it up. Because of it,I slowly started hating the class like literally.I'd do all the work during the tutorials but then once out of the class,I never open the text book or notes once ! Its also because of the lecturer by the way she talks about me and stuff. Im a type of person that WILL like/love the lecturer if 1)they ignore me completely and acknowledge my existence when I ask questions and 2) if the lecturer continuously praise me and says Im doing a good job or 3)Its English class

Its a bit different for Finance class. During first class I was super nervous that it was going to be difficult for me since it involves like 38% of Financial Accounting and I SUCK big time in that subject.SO I asked the lecturer all sorts of questions.I was not so good at the subject for the first few chapters but then when we entered the topic where we need to find the future/present value of something,I understand everything and was able to do the tutorials and exercises with ease and was also able to do them in a short amount of time.I think that got the attention of my lecturer so he started asking me to go out front and explain to everyone how to do it and also keeps on praising how a good job I am doing. I did not get a full mark for the 2nd test but I was satisfied with what I got.Even duirng the test I was literally had my head in the books,I did all the past year questions and even wrote down all the equations in 1 single paper for each chapter with different colours. I was able to memorise all of them because of it.I was so happy during the 2nd test because I memorised everything.

Some people might say its wrong for me to like and dislike subjects and that my reasons are just pure bull shits.

Till then..